I have random worries today and I am weighed down with a significant weight on my shoulders. When this happens a chain of events inevitably leads to my dreaded eyeball problem!  Inside my eye socket there is no damn blink and my eyeballs become black marbles. When I am forced to make eye contact with others I feel as if I am staring at them and my madness is transparent.

I have found that my eyeballs respond intensely when I am depressed afraid or angry. At times it is as simple as needing eye drops but most of the time it takes a while of being uncomfortable and working on the feelings.

When my eyes do not blink the look on my face is crazy or even mean looking.  I have a bug-eyed or deer in the headlights look that frightens me when I look in the mirror. I know it must leave others leery of contact with me.

I am suspicious that others are looking at me so I make sure I watch them. This only makes the staring worse. I do not dare to look down for fear I will lose my marbles and be completely in the dark.

 The thing that helps is to write. Searching for the words to explain, even if I can not find them, the process of trying some times brings back the blink and then my softened eyes trigger a deeper breath and my shoulders lighten up. I check in the mirror to see how I look. More times than not I can bring back the blink and find softened eyes in the mirror.