Nature and Healing:Cycle of the Storm
June 11, 2008 3:25 pm Living MetaphorsIt is easy to find an image in nature that mirrors the symptoms of rapid cycling and that is the cycle of thunderstorms. In
Cycle of the Storm
Yesterday it was raining buckets long before dawn. I was awake and gathering my thoughts for today’s post. The night before held a grey-green stillness that announced the coming of a storm. It was also the gathering of electrical energy in the atmosphere heard in the far off rumble of thunder and blinking flashes of lighting. All through the night the storm worked its way through to the end but it was the build up that was threatening.
Out my bedroom window I could see the ranch to the south. Three paint ponies and two young colts were darting through the pasture with tails and manes flying high. It was a framed off scene of power and beauty. Yet in the rapid cycling years I would experience sensations of electrical exhilaration with the very sight of running horses. But soon my dream of riding bare back would mutate into a distorted sense of my self flying high and summon all kinds of melancholy. I would be the captive of my “chair of depression”.
Despite the storm I drove into town. Rushing red water was flooding over some of the low lying roadways. I decided to take an alternate route to avoid the murky stream of muddy red water. My mind was somewhat distracted by the periodic down pours and the concern that I might hydro plane at any moment. My shoulders were tense, my eyes tightened and I questioned my decision to make the trip. Before long the rain let up and the sun came out. I began to relax and take in the beautiful glow of sunshine through the clouds. This had been one of the harder trips to make but the images were clear and I needed to tell this story. As if awakening from a nightmare the recollection of rapid cycling is fading and I am once again in my new found place of peace and wellness.
June 11th, 2008 at 3:53 pm
Dear Annie,
These images are so great; clearly the end result of all this has got to be a book.
As a Los Angeles native, I can’t imagine what it’s like to live so intimately with nature. In a way, because it’s so far afield from my frame of reference, it’s kind of frightening.
But, since my husband and I used to spend weeks each summer fishing in the mountains, I have had some nature experiences.
Years ago, we were in Mammoth Lakes, CA during an earthquake and although I’d experienced many earthquakes in Los Angeles that were much worse, I still have a visceral feeling from the one in Mammoth.
However, I don’t have the words to describe nature as you do, and I’m loving reading you!
Susan
June 11th, 2008 at 4:37 pm
“Electircal Exhiliration” what a marvellous description. It is exactly what it feels like!
One of the great things about blogging about bipolar is that I hear descriptions such as these which bring meaning to my own life. And when you think about it, how cool is that. It’s been the best bipolar support group I ever could have imagined: creative, purging, raw, honest, illuminating, meaningful, and often funny – as in funny, I’ve been there too!
June 11th, 2008 at 7:44 pm
What a vivid description! Annie, thanks for sharing your experiences with us. This post is precious to me as I am continuing to learn to understand bipolar. Take care! Have a blessed day!
June 11th, 2008 at 11:33 pm
The vicious storm can be so powerful, especially how you describe it. I am so glad to hear that you sit beyond the storm in a safe shelter of wellness right now.
In the midst of the confusion and unwellness I have felt in the past, I have referred to it as a hurricane. I think it is interesting thing in common that we have found these ways of imagining our mood as relating to a storm. I don’t know that I can imagine my unwellness any other way, actually! So your post really spoke volumes to me.
Take care sweets.
June 12th, 2008 at 12:22 am
Very vivid post
June 12th, 2008 at 8:47 am
G’day from Sydney, Australia
Good on you for blogging on bipolar- i’ll try to get my father to do the same.
I sometimes wonder- is it bad, a negative thing to have a mental illness- is it to be rejected- or is it simply part of the human spectrum- most of which should be not judged too harshly.
Good luck in your experience of life- it’s your experience- dont let other’s deny it to you.
well- do what you feel best- i just felt like commmenting on this topic.
thanks for letting me share,
kind regards,
michelle
June 12th, 2008 at 8:51 am
The storm metaphor is a wonderful one–I’ve used it myself to describe mixed states. You write about it so beautifully and vividly, painting pictures in my mind’s eye.
June 12th, 2008 at 1:21 pm
Susan, thanks for the comments. How interesting that you would experience nature in such a different way. I lived in the Twin Cities for many years so I have some sense of what you mean. I am glad you are reading my posts, I value your feedback. Annie
June 12th, 2008 at 1:23 pm
Acorn- I agree with you that blogging is an excellent support system. I am still new to it but enjoy writing and reading others posts. Thanks for the comments. Annie
June 12th, 2008 at 1:26 pm
Nancie, I glad that you feel like commenting.Thank you for the kind comments. I hope it helps you learn more about your own experience. Annie
June 12th, 2008 at 1:29 pm
Jena- Thanks for the comments on storms and for your interest in my wellness. I too wish wellness for you! Annie
June 12th, 2008 at 1:31 pm
Raine- thank you for the comment and good to know you are still reading! I hope you are feeling somewhat better. Annie
June 12th, 2008 at 1:34 pm
Michelle, glad to have your stop by. It is an interesting thought that mental illness is part of the “human spectrum”. I might write about it at some point. Thanks so much for the comments.Annie
June 12th, 2008 at 1:35 pm
Jazz, glad i created an image in your minds eye. Thanks for your comments. Annie
June 12th, 2008 at 9:55 pm
Annie,
Your prose is poetic. It’s really very beautiful…I don’t have anything deeply insightful to say…just want you to know I’m enjoying your blog.
June 14th, 2008 at 5:11 am
Oh Annie, you are a true poet.
June 14th, 2008 at 11:55 am
Gianna, Your comments are so kind, I appreciate them and hope you continue to enjoy my posts. Come again! Annie
June 14th, 2008 at 11:57 am
Amanda, Thank you for your comment, It means a lot to me that you enjoyed it! Annie
June 14th, 2008 at 12:44 pm
hi,
You write very nice.
i hardly read long articles
but yours is attractive and sweetly written with deep understanding ..
Wondering if wellness ever exists for us,
i hope so
June 15th, 2008 at 4:47 pm
Othersideofblue- Hello, welcome to my site. Your comments were very dear. I think we can have wellness, sometimes we may have set backs but still return to wellness. Keep on hoping! Annie